Real Athletes Poop Their Pants - And love the Jonas Brothers?

It was the summer of 2007 and I was working as the Travel Coordinator and Equipment Manager for the Connecticut Sun WNBA Team.  I had just graduated from UConn so maybe all the time I spent studying meant that I was a little behind on my pop culture.  One game the ball kids were going crazy with excitement about the half time show performers: The Jonas Brothers.  I had never heard of these guys, but they were so excited so I managed to snap a photo of the ball kids and the Jonas Brothers together.  In 2008, the Jonas Brothers were nominated for the Best New Artist Award at the Grammy's... so they must have been pretty good.

#TBT - the Jonas Brothers (Kevin, Joe, and Nick) and the Connecticut Sun Ball Kids (Carly, Maggie, and Clare)

Interesting fact about Nick Jonas: he was diagnosed as a type I diabetic at age 13 in 2005 - not long before that photo was taken.  The Jonas brothers as a band were pretty big from 2007-2011.  In 2015, Nick Jonas co-founded the group "Beyond Type I" whose mission is to educate, advocate, and provide resources to those who face diabetes.   This past week, Beyond Type I featured one of my closest friends on their website telling a story about her experience with Type I Diabetes as a long distance runner.  Her post has been re-posted in its entirety below, but before we get to her humor - here are five things you should know about Type I Diabetes.

1) The difference between Type I and Type II Diabetes:
Type I Diabetics are unable to make sufficient insulin in their pancreas to regulate their blood sugar.  The function of insulin in the body is to bring sugar into cells so it can be used for energy.  Without insulin, sugar remains in the blood which can harm organs and even be fatal.  Type I Diabetes is not curable, but through constant attention to diet and supplemental insulin, people can live full lives with the condition.  This differs from Type II Diabetes in which a person has built up resistance to insulin at their cells over time but whose pancreas still makes insulin.  Type II can be reversed through dietary changes and exercise.

2) Signs/symptoms of Diabetes:
With both Type I and Type II diabetes, it is common to experience increased urination, increased thirst,  and dry mouth.  Type I diabetics may also experience fatigue, abdominal cramping, nausea, vomiting, and a breath smelling like acetone which are less commonly seen with Type II diabetics. 

3) Insulin supplementation:
Type I Diabetics use supplemental insulin to regulate their blood sugars because they are unable to do so naturally or by diet and exercise.  They have to constantly track their sugar levels and consider the impact of anything they eat and the effect it will have on their body. Because they supplement with insulin, they can also experience hypoglycemia (too low blood sugar.)  Signs/symptoms of too low blood sugar include sweating, shakiness, light headedness, confusion, and fainting.  Because of the severe impact of low blood sugar, if you happen to come across someone with an ID bracelet identifying that they are diabetic, it is potentially lifesaving to give them sugar and call 911. 

4) Global Issue
While 90% of diabetics are Type II, the trend has been increasing for Type I by about 2-5% per year.  The frequency is not evenly distributed around the world.  For Type I Diabetes, Finland has a high frequency, the US has a moderate frequency, and China has a low frequency.  Interestingly, the above linked paper also notes that none of the regions had more females than males with Type I Diabetes but I only know four people with Type I Diabetes and they're all women. It is important to recognize that there are essential differences between the two conditions and that because Type II is so much more common, you need to be aware of which type you're reading about because the information usually does not apply to both types.  Diagnosis, treatment, and medications differ between Type I and Type II. 

5) Genetic Disposition
Multiple genes have been identified to relate to Type I Diabetes, but 40-50% of family linked cases relate to chromosome #6 and variations in Human Leukocyte Antigen which is a regulator of the immune system.  In the USA, 1 in 20 Type I Diabetics have a family member with the condition compared to 1 in 300 from the general population.  Identical twins are seen to have >60% and fraternal twins 6-10% occurrence of Type I Diabetes.  Children diagnosed before age 5 are suspected to have a higher genetic predisposition in their family than those diagnosed later in life.

Enough of the serious business and back to the reason for this post.  The following article first appeared on the "Beyond Type I" site here on April 11, 2018 and was written by my friend Cat Carter (reproduced with her permission).  She has run 29 Half Marathons - at least half of those since she was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes.  I like to claim that her running habit is my fault, as her first half marathon was in Providence, RI, with me.  If she ever commits to running one in Seattle, I'll get back to training to do another one - but until that time, I stair climb and I don't run.  After Providence, she kept running them and I sat in a chair in the corner of Koon's Hall at UConn for the next 3 years. There has been extensive debate about how and when we met, but we've been friends for at least 15 years and I lived with her for all of PT School - so if she can suffer through the terrible person I was when hungry and sleep deprived, she's gotta be worth getting to know.  Enjoy her post!

With Cat Carter before the Providence, RI Half Marathon

I run half marathons for many reasons. a) I enjoy the physical and mental challenges each race offers. b) Runners are some of the friendliest folks around, so although I prefer to train alone, I have met some of the kindest and coolest people at races and in my running clubs. c) My internal motivation is super in the toilet, so it’s a safe bet that I won’t exercise without a race on my calendar. d) The world is full of blissfully ignorant fools. Harsh and unkind words, I know. But seriously, how often do you hear ridiculous diabetes jokes? How many instances can you think of when the media, a politician, or another individual or group with influence and power spread blatantly wrong information about the disease? I run to prove them all wrong and spread our Truth.

And e) I like medals. I like how they look hanging on my wall. I like how they sound when they clink together. And I love the memories and feelings of accomplishment each one of them evokes. I’m not at all above doing a race for the bling. I did a race in Amish Country one time because its medal was a horseshoe. A horseshoe. It was awesome. And my amazing wife was inseminated without me there because I was doing a race that had a shark finisher medal. (Yes, you read that right. Who knew it was going to take on the first try? I mean, really, what are the odds? Mama loves you, Liam, and I promise I won’t miss any other critical moments of your life.) So when I found a race for which the medal was a grilled cheese sandwich (a local race no less – you go, Connecticut!) you bet your ass I was all in.

Unfortunately, that particular June day in 2016 turned out to be rather rainy. Now normally I don’t hate running in the rain. It’s not the worst thing ever. Sure, putting all of my (diabetes tracking/treating) devices in waterproof bags is less than ideal and a royal pain in the ass, but it’s manageable. While we’re here, how many of you hate that word? “Manageable.” Ugh, gross. It’s almost as bad as “moist.” If I hear one more person say, “Hey, don’t worry, diabetes is manageable,” I’m going to come unglued. I think the world needs a quick tutorial on the meaning of “manageable.”

Aaaaaaaaaaaaanyway. I’m going to reel myself back in. Where were we? Yes, the grilled cheese race. Okay, so there I was plugging along mile after mile when I felt something … below. Like, below, below. In the bottom of my pants below. So I did what any human being who thinks they’ve just pooped their pants would do: I panicked internally for roughly three minutes. Which I know doesn’t sounds like a long time, but do me a solid – pun intended – and take a pause for three minutes. While taking that pause, imagine you’ve just pooped your pants, you’re in a very public place, and you have absolutely no idea where the nearest restroom is. Now, can we agree that three minutes is on the same level as an eternity?

Here was the major problem – not only was the medal a grilled cheese sandwich, but all finishers also got a real grilled cheese sandwich with chocolate milk. I was wicked hungry, and I really wanted that sandwich, but you cannot just roll into the food line at the end of a race with poopy pants. You will make exactly zero friends doing that. So I summoned the courage to nonchalantly check the damage, and much to my relief it wasn’t poop … but my Omnipod. That slippery little sh*t.  My pump! I never thought I’d be excited to learn my pump fell off, but at that moment in time I was damned near ecstatic. It was the first race I’d done in the rain since diabetes, and I didn’t even think to reinforce my pod. Stuck to my upper buttocks, it must have lost its adhesion in the *moist* conditions and slid down. Thankfully I had a pen in the car I could use post-race for my coveted sandwich, now only a short 2 miles away – crisis averted.

In closing, real athletes poop their pants. I’ve read about it on the Internet, so it must be true. See here, here, and here. What did I tell you? It’s totally, 100% a thing. So if I thought I pooped my pants and didn’t slow down (or cry!) … I must be a real athlete, too. Go. Me. And if you’ve ever pooped (or peed) your pants while getting your diabadass workout on, then go, you, too!